The Fresh Prinze of Hollywood

FreddieWhen you think of great actors, 3 names come to mind; Daniel Day Lewis, Gene Hackman, and Reginald VelJohnson. For most people, they recognize Reginald’s work from Family Matters as the warm and loving father Carl Winslow, who happens to get mad at Steven Urkel from time to time, because Steven can get into some pretty sticky situations. In the episode entitled, “The Gun”, Laura gets scared about a female gang at school and wants to get a gun, but Steven Urkel begs her to reconsider her decision, according to IMDB and anyone who watched the episode. It was a heartwarming episode about a family trying to get by in Chicago, but thats not what this story is about. In that episode, a star emerged from the role of “tough guy.” In an interview with JoMarie Payton, the actress who played Harriette Winslow, she discussed tough guy. “You could tell he had what it takes to make it in Hollywood. His chemistry with Darius McCrary (Eddie Winslow) was unbelievable.” Well most people come and go on Family Matters, or go on to do work on shows like Step by Step, “the pornography of the sitcom industry” as Jaleel White (Steven Urkel)  calls it, but not this young man. This young man turned out to be Freddie Prinze Jr., but his star was not always this bright.

Growing up in Luxembourg, the capital of Luxembourg, Prince Guillaume lived a posh life. “I could pretty much do whatever I wanted,” said Prinze, “Being a prince is a lot like acting in the movie, ‘A Kid in King Arthur’s Court’ starring Thomas Ian Nicholas (Rookie of the Year), or ‘Black Knight’ starring Martin Lawrence (Martin).” I loved doing the everyday prince stuff, but sometimes I used to think there might be more to the world than Luxembourg, and I mean outside of Diekirch and Grevenmacher. It took FPJ almost 15 years to realize there was more to the world than Luxembourg City. He lived a sheltered life inside his giant castle. “I would mostly study ancient scrolls, make potions, and sword fight, but sometimes I like to ride horses and joust. I was the jousting champion of Luxembourg for two years.” His life was great, but one day the evil sorcerer, Raymond the Unjust, used a potion to convince the King to have Guillaume marry his disgusting and equally unjust daughter, Stevie Nicks (who coincidentally has a song named “Sorcerer”). Guillaume was trapped between a rock and an unjust future wife, but he escaped from Luxembourg, as difficult as that may be in modern times. He made his way to the only place he knew in America, Hollywood.

Prince Guillaume arrived in Charleston, South Carolina and made his way to Hollywood, South Carolina, not realizing it wasn’t the same one for another 3 months. He promptly made his way to Hollywood, California, as it is easy to travel across the country with a backpack filled with the rarest of Luxembourg jewels. 2 weeks, 4 rubies, and 12 ruby tuesdays later, he was in Hollywood. The day he arrived there was the very same day he met his future best friend, and long lost older brother, actor Matthew Lillard. “I saw him, and I knew right away what had happened. That dick, sorcerer Raymond, tried the same bullshit with me” said Lillard. “I told Guillaume that he needed to change his name so the sorcerer wouldn’t find him, so he picked Freddie Prinze, Jr.”  The reunited brothers tore through Hollywood, making amazing film after amazing film together, such as Scooby Doo, Scooby Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed, Wing Commander, Summer Catch, and the critically acclaimed “She’s All That.” Co-star Rachael Leigh Cook describes Freddy and Matthew, as “the best brother duo that I’ve ever worked with” and that is saying a lot, since she has worked with the Thompson brothers in a performance of “Joseph and the Technicolor Dreamcoat” during high school in Minneapolis, Minnesota. It was said to be one of the top 3 performances at this local theater.

Freddie could be seen rubbing elbows with some of Hollywoods most famous 3 name people, like Sarah Michelle Gellar, Jennifer Love Hewitt, Seann William Scott, and David Hyde Pierce. “Dr. Niles Crayne (DHP) was my favorite person to chill out and relax with, besides my brother obviously. I used to call him that all the time, and he thought it was hilarious,” said Prinze.  Life was good, but one day, on the set of “Summer Catch” Freddie and Matthew Lillard were goofing around, when sorcerer Raymond the Unjust appeared. He took a poison arrow out and shot it at Freddie with the Bow of Fortitude, the most accurate Bow in all of Luxembourg. Luckily, Matthew Lillard is the fastest person in the history of Luxembourg and pushed Freddie out of the way in time, saving his brother, while also sealing his own fate. The arrow struck Lillard in the wrist, but was too dull to pierce his strong Luxembourgian skin. The poison however, caused Lillard to have a mild case of carpal-tunnels syndrome in his wrist, making it difficult, but not impossible, to operate a computer on a regular basis. The good news was that sorcerer Raymond the Unjust learned a valuable lesson that day about friendship and brotherhood, and changed his name to Pierre Joris and is renown for his lymrics and poetry all across Luxembourg.

Advertisements

One response to “The Fresh Prinze of Hollywood

  1. whatever happened to is it me, Freddie Prinze Jr.?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s